Julia T. Williams | Friends…How Many of Us Have Them?
Julia T. Williams is a storyteller on a mission to help better lives through storytelling. She writes about all the things that go wrong and how people fight to make them right. Telling stories that matter while helping others cultivate theirs.
soul, storytelling, stories that matter, storyteller on a mission, stories to better lives,
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Friends…How Many of Us Have Them?

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One day I was sitting, reflecting on the friends I made in 2004.  I barely talk to any of them now.  One in particular ( I won’t say her name, but she’ll know who she is if she reads this).  Well, I feel kind of used by her.  See, shortly after we became friends I opened my home to her.  I told her if she ever needed a place to stay when she came, she was welcomed to stay here.  She didn’t live far….Macon to be exact.  I knew that she would visit to go to the club and whatnot so driving back at four in the a.m. was not a good idea.
Anyway, every time she came to Atlanta she’d stay here.  Let’s say about every other weekend.  Twice she asked to bring a friend.  Mind you, I have a 600 sq. ft., one bedroom apartment.  I didn’t have a problem though.  She just slept on the floor and I shared my bed with her friend.Description: eyebrow  The other time they couldn’t stay because I had a friend visiting from St. Lou.  What used to kill me is that she would wait til the day before to ask, or better yet, tell me that she was coming to town.  I guess we had a silent agreement that I didn’t know about that said she could automatically stay here when she came.
Honestly, I didn’t have so much of a problem with her staying here.  She was a cool person.  What I guess bothered me was the fact that not once did she offer any money.  She paid for me to get in the club one time and treated me to IHOP.  Guess that was good enough.  Hmph!  Once, as soon as she got here she wanted to go get something to eat.  Seafood.  So we went to Red Lobster.  When the waiter asked about the check she quickly said, “seperate.”  I was like…cool.  Negative.  Especially when she came on Friday and wasn’t leaving until Monday.  Even brought her dog (my request), who had taken a leak on my carpet before we left.  That weekend was crazy because I was home with the dog all day every day.  I took her walking and cleaned up her SHIT that was left all on my carpet.Description: yell  She offered to have my carpet cleaned, but didn’t push the issue.  She bought some stuff to get up the stains that she could see at the time and took the bottle home with her.  After she left, I found a million more stains that the dog had left.  I went out and bought my own stuff.  Didn’t even bother keeping a receipt for her to reimburse.  
That was her last time staying with me.  Not my decision.  She just stopped calling.  What makes it so bad is that I can count on one hand the amount of times we’ve talked since then.  She doesn’t call me like she used to.  I barely even get an email.  I really feel used.  Like she was only being my friend for a FREE place to stay.  Calling me or emailing because she knew it was only a matter of time before she’d be back in town.  It sucks to feel this way, but how else should I feel.  I’m only stating the obvious.  I thought she was more genuine than that.  
If you’re reading this, please, by all means correct me if I’m wrong.  I thought you were better than that. 
I’m just going to take people for what they are.  I don’t have time to hold on to friendships that aren’t meant to be held on to.  If we only talk or email, when I take the initiative, then that means our friendship is one sided.  Life is too short for that nonsense.  I’m getting ready to have a delete party.  Begin anew.  Friends, how many of us have them?
I decided that for the next few months that I’m going to wear my hair in cornrows and fro’s.  Twists just aren’t working any more.  I can’t wait til summer because I want to try a new, vibrant color on my hair inspired by a natural chick on Biker Boys.  I’m headed to Nappturality to look in some hair albums for a neat, cornrow style.  I’ll post a pic in my weight loss journal when I’m done.
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